Parenting is a subject that I have never touched in my life when it comes to writing..Might be becasue after being a mother I never got time to sit and type about what i really think about it...
Today I have some spare time and I have a bad feel about scolding my baby for a silly thing, which I could have avoided...But sometimes, you know, we tend to forget they are so small and new to everything that we have introduced to them...
I was always short tempered when it comes to people who are close to me and as obviously my son being the most suitable person with that crietria, i really get all fumed up when he do something against my 'plan of action'.. Thanks to all the people who are super cool around me, I can rarely show that to him..It will seriously affect my image as the dotting mom and next time he gets angry to anyone, I am sure to get a glance saying " Ha, this is exactly what you do" :D
I don't know about others but even when i am considered as a super cool person outside, after being a mom, i read tons of articles regarding anger management!!! And i still read all that comes across me regarding parenting..I really wanted to be the the best mom ever..he he..Who doesnt?
So i thought i will write something that made me feel good of doing as a parent...
- Express your love (As i am kind of expressive person and being pretty good at it, it is easy for me :p)
- Appreciate them for all the little things they do. For them it is big and mostly the first time :)
- Talk to them as much as you could (Believe me, no books can be that funny and creative)
- When they try to talk to you, even if its something silly and you are busy with something very important, listen to them, and give them a reply.
- If you want to avoid them, dont tell to go away or that you are busy...Give them some task that will occupy them..or ask them to sit with someone who is equally dear... or if nobody is there, nothing wrong in letting them watch their cartoon for sometime while you finish your work..Don't simply avoid them and let them play alone.
- Don't express anger by shouting or hitting (Sometimes i forget but still i try to control it to the max. When you are angry and want to scold them for some wrong thing which you dont want them to repeat..simply stare at them for sometime and walk away...I strongly believe it works 1000% better than shouting..When we shout, they just don't understand what we speak, they simply get scared, then sad and then they might feel we don't love them...(I tend to shout only when I am in a hurry and really short of time to stare and walk away ..lol..:D)....When you walk away they will come to you or sit silent. Then after some time when they try to patch up with you, tell them you felt bad and being mom's dear don't repeat it. At first, its difficult but if you practicse it for few days you will definitely see a huge difference.
- Dont let them watch violent natured movies or ads or cartoons. They are not ripe enough to understand what is right or wrong. When they find that their parents are keenly watching that kind of actions, they try to imitate it. It is simply because they will take it as something good.
- And, I personally think it is better to grow childern as intolerant to violance rather than making them feeling violance as a part of life.
- I got a real feel of the extent of tolerance the kids have towards violence when I went to watch the movie - Bahubali, which is an epic movie. While i was literally keeping my eyes closed to avoid so many scenes, i found that the 7/8 year kid who was sitting next to me watched all that violence without blinking his eyes. And to be very frank it scared me. I like when kids (adults too) get upset seeing violence. That's what we have to teach them. Not to be strong enough to sit and watch a person being beheaded. They should be strong enough to feel bad and express that they are upset seeing all this.
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